Category: trauma

Summer break can be particularly challenging for children with high ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) scores for several reasons:

Disruption of Routine: Children with high ACE scores often benefit from predictable routines and structured environments. Summer break disrupts their daily routine of school, which can lead to feelings of instability and uncertainty.

Loss of Supportive Networks: School environments often provide supportive networks for children, including teachers, counselors, and friends who may be aware of their needs and challenges. During summer break, these supportive networks may not be as readily available.

Increased Stress at Home: For some children with high ACE scores, home environments may not always be conducive to positive growth and development. Increased time at home during summer break can expose them to stressful situations or environments that lack the support and structure they need.

Limited Access to Resources: Schools often provide resources such as meals, educational support, and extracurricular activities that are not available during summer break. Children with high ACE scores may miss out on these resources, which can affect their well-being and development.

Social Isolation: Summer break can lead to social isolation for some children, particularly if they have difficulties making friends or have experienced trauma that makes it harder for them to connect with peers.

Lack of Mental Stimulation: Without the structured learning environment of school, some children may experience a lack of mental stimulation during summer break, which can exacerbate behavioral challenges or emotional difficulties.

Increased Risk of Regression: Children with high ACE scores may be more susceptible to regression in their academic skills or emotional progress during extended breaks from school, which can impact their overall development.

TBRI (Trust-Based Relational Intervention) can be highly beneficial for children, especially those with high ACE scores, during summer break. Here’s how TBRI principles can help:

Creating a Safe Environment: TBRI emphasizes creating a safe physical and emotional environment for children. During summer break, this means ensuring that the home environment remains consistent, stable, and predictable, which can help children feel secure even without the structure of school.

Maintaining Structure and Routine: TBRI encourages the establishment of routines and predictable schedules, which is crucial for children with high ACE scores. During summer break, maintaining consistent meal times, bedtimes, and daily routines can provide children with a sense of stability and security.

Building Connection: TBRI focuses on building strong relationships between caregivers and children. During summer break, caregivers can use this time to strengthen their bond with the child through intentional interactions, play, and shared activities. This helps children feel emotionally supported and connected, which is crucial for their well-being.

Empowering and Teaching Life Skills: TBRI emphasizes teaching practical life skills and empowering children to make positive choices. Summer break can be an opportunity to teach children new skills, such as cooking, gardening, or budgeting, which can boost their confidence and sense of competence.

Addressing Behavioral Challenges: TBRI provides strategies for addressing challenging behaviors with empathy and understanding. Caregivers can use these principles to respond calmly and effectively to behavioral challenges that may arise during summer break, helping to promote a positive and supportive environment.

Supporting Self-Regulation: TBRI helps children learn self-regulation skills by teaching them how to identify and manage their emotions. Caregivers can support these skills during summer break by providing opportunities for relaxation, mindfulness, and physical activity, which can help children regulate their emotions and behavior.

Providing Opportunities for Learning and Growth: TBRI encourages caregivers to provide opportunities for learning and growth tailored to the child’s interests and strengths. During summer break, caregivers can engage children in educational activities, hobbies, and outings that promote intellectual stimulation and creativity.

Overall, TBRI principles can help caregivers create a nurturing and supportive environment for children during summer break, fostering their emotional well-being, growth, and development despite the challenges that may arise outside of the school environment. For more information on TBRI and how you can implement it into your daily lives, contact Connected Treasures. https://connectedtreasures.org/contact/

“Big T trauma” and “little t trauma” are terms often used in psychology and trauma studies to differentiate between different levels or types of traumatic experiences. While there is no universally accepted definition or categorization, these terms are commonly used to describe the varying degrees of trauma people may experience.

Big T Trauma: Big T trauma refers to major, life-threatening events or experiences that are typically seen as more severe and have a profound impact on an individual’s life. These traumatic events are usually single incidents or a series of events that are significantly distressing and overwhelming. Examples of big T traumas include natural disasters, war, physical or sexual assault, severe accidents, or witnessing violence.  These events are often what people associate PTSD with. 

Little t Trauma: Little t trauma, on the other hand, refers to more subtle or chronic experiences that are distressing but may not involve immediate or life-threatening danger. These traumas are often less dramatic or obvious but can still have a cumulative and lasting impact on an individual’s well-being.  These traumas are often repetitive, ongoing, and cumulative in nature, and they can have a significant impact on an individual’s psychological well-being. Little t traumas can include experiences such as emotional neglect, verbal abuse, chronic humiliation, bullying, discrimination, loss of a loved one, witnessing repetitive distressing events, or growing up in a dysfunctional family environment.  While these traumas may not be as immediately overwhelming as big T traumas, they can still have long-lasting effects on an individual’s mental health and may contribute to symptoms like anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and difficulties in relationships.

You may also have heard the phrase Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs.)  This phrase originates from a specific research study that was conducted from 1995 – 1997.  The initial ACEs study involved over 17,000 participants who completed questionnaires about their childhood experiences and their current health status. While there are of course many other adverse experiences that can occur in childhood, the study assessed ten specific types of adverse childhood experiences: physical, emotional, and sexual abuse, neglect, household dysfunction (such as witnessing domestic violence or substance abuse), parental separation or divorce, having a parent or primary caregiver with a mental illness, and having a parent or close family member that has been incarcerated.  

Several of these ACEs could generally be considered “little t” traumas because they overwhelm a child’s ability to cope and negatively impact their physical, emotional, or psychological well-being. Remember that big T trauma occurs when a child’s safety, security, or sense of self is threatened, and they do not have the necessary support systems to process and recover from the experience. Here are some ways in which ACEs can become a Big T trauma:

1. Lack of Supportive Relationships: If a child experiences ACEs without the presence of caring and supportive adults or a reliable support network, they may struggle to process their emotions and experiences. The absence of a safe and nurturing environment can intensify the impact of ACEs and contribute to the development of trauma.
2. Powerlessness and Control: ACEs often involve a loss of control or powerlessness, such as experiencing abuse, neglect, or witnessing domestic violence. These situations can lead to a sense of helplessness and vulnerability, which can contribute to the development of trauma.
3. Cumulative Effect: ACEs often occur in clusters, meaning that children may experience multiple traumatic events or adverse circumstances over an extended period. The cumulative effect of multiple ACEs can increase the likelihood of developing trauma, as the ongoing stress and lack of respite can overwhelm a child’s coping mechanisms.
4. Disrupted Development: ACEs can disrupt a child’s normal developmental process, affecting their emotional regulation, cognitive development, and ability to form healthy relationships. These disruptions can have long-lasting consequences and contribute to the development of trauma.
5. Lack of Validation and Understanding: If children do not receive validation, understanding, or appropriate support following ACEs, it can further exacerbate the traumatic impact. Dismissal, denial, or lack of acknowledgment of their experiences can prevent healing and recovery.

It’s important to note that not all children who experience ACEs will experience long term effects of trauma, as individual resilience and support systems can play a protective role. However, when ACEs overwhelm a child’s capacity to cope and lack the necessary support systems, the risk of Big T trauma significantly increases.

I love writing these posts to share knowledge, hope and encouragement. But when I know that someone else has nailed a topic so well I can’t do better, I share their knowledge directly because you deserve the best.

https://robyngobbel.com/lying/

It’s time for bed and I brush my teeth, put on some pajamas, plug in my phone, say good night to the pups, and then…check my schedule. Yep, I review my schedule for the day that is ending to bring closure, and look ahead to see what is coming tomorrow.

I wake up and what is the first thing I do? Say good morning to whichever family member has awoken me … I mean I haven’t needed an alarm clock in years. Quickly followed by this is a stretch and a check of, you guessed it, my schedule for the day. Before I even drag my body out of bed I have looked at what’s ahead and begun planning. What will I wear, will I be leaving the house, what are the transportation needs of the day, what has to be done before I leave the house…

We all use visual schedules. Wall calendars, google calendar, iCal, Outlook, appointment books. Many of us link our visual schedule to auditory reminders via our phones and virtual assistants. Why do we do this? Because we worry that we will miss something. We will forget an appointment. We won’t accomplish all of our tasks if we don’t organize and plan. Because without those visual reminders, we become overwhelmed by the rush of our daily lives. We become stressed and anxious. We make mistakes which lead to disappointments and confusion.

So if we, as grown adults, rely heavily on visual schedules, (and still make mistakes in planning,) why would we expect our children to NOT use them too?

School is ending and summer is beginning. While this brings images of idyllic days filled with sunshine and spontaneous play, the reality is, most days are spent moving from activity to activity, trying to calm the anxious child and help them focus. The anxious child is left asking, “what are we doing?” ALL DAY LONG with intermittent outbursts, behavioral melt downs and endless power struggles.

Here are 10 reasons why you need to begin using visual schedules NOW:

Provides organization, structure and predictability to the day. Visual schedules are a great way to build routine and inform kids about the expectations for the day. For many children they have learned the routines of the school year and rely heavily on the predictability of getting ready for school and the structure of the school day. Summer vacation often takes away that structure and predictability, leading to anxiety and dysregulation.

Allows change to be introduced easily. A new task or activity can easily be introduced into a visual schedule by placing it between two items already on the schedule. Since kids can see the new change visually and where that change takes place, they can adapt better to those changes. Always have a wild card ready to add in.

Independence: Caregiver, I know you’re busy and I know you long for you child to be just a little bit more independent. If you have a schedule, you can transition and navigate your day without another person having to tell you where to go and what to do.

They help avoid power struggles. If I have a schedule that tells me what to do, I can’t argue with it. I can’t tell you how many times I have said, “Schedule says ” and had the child follow the direction but if I said, “I need you to do ” it wouldn’t happen. The schedule takes the “personal” piece out of it and makes it more objective.

They provide a permanent visual reminder. I can leave a schedule with them and they can check it throughout the day. When I move on to something else, the activity or the transition doesn’t stop.

They relieve anxiety. Imagine if I took your calendar away from you. Would you know when your dentist appointment would be? Do you know the location of your child’s game?You might find you keep asking those questions when you don’t have a visual to refer to (i.e., your calendar). Do you have a child that is constantly questioning? Sometimes it’s because they are anxious about what is going to happen next. A schedule allows them to check their schedule instead of checking with you and learn to independently moderate their anxiety. Reducing anxiety allows them to focus on the task at hand.

They communicate with others. They give children and other members of the home information about what is going to happen and what is expected. When I check my schedule and it tells me we are going to the playground with friends, I know to be prepared to go outside and for loud voices all around me. If it tells me it’s time for a a meeting, I begin to calm my body and focus my mind on the upcoming agenda. This communication also helps them use picture symbols receptively to understand what is happening in their environment and eventually to communicate. It also allows others in the home to know what is expected of each other for the day so you can tag out without a 10 minute dissertation.

They ease transitions. Switching tasks can be extremely tough for children, especially if they are unexpected changes. A visual schedule, however, reduces meltdowns and struggles about moving to the next task because the schedule visually depicts what comes next. As a result, the schedule helps kids anticipate any changes.

Teaches responsibility and planning. Children can take part in planning out their day by helping their parents or teachers build the visual schedule or routine for the day. Doing so allows them to think about and plan out tasks in an appropriate sequence, helping to build strong executive functioning skills. With scaffolding and building on learned skills, kids also learn to move onto the next task or activity on the schedule on their own after completing the previous one.

Creating and planning the schedule builds connection. When children have your undivided attention for 2 minutes planning out the day, there is negotiation and children feel seen, heard and valued. As the caregiver, you feel a sense of accomplishment in telling a child they are valued and they can trust you. It also alleviates some of your anxiety helping you to be more fully present with your child.

Individuals who have had traumatic experiences often understand visual information best. This isn’t true of all individuals, but for many they comprehend information faster and more easily visually. So why not use a medium that uses their strengths. Some children may need specific times while most just need an order to their day. Schedules do not need to be super specific but general. Inside play, outside play, clean up, bath, library, park, etc. Coupled with transitional cues, such as verbal reminders 10 minutes until , 5 minutes until , visual schedules can take a day of anxiety and power struggles and turn it into that summer fun you crave.

For some examples of images to use, visit https://thisreadingmama.com/visual-summer-schedule-printable/

I am so excited to be able to offer this amazing curriculum! Thank you Cindy Lee, LCSW and the Halo Project for allowing me to train as a facilitator (and for making me a better parent and therapist in the process!)

Below is a description of this amazing curriculum from the Halo Project and author Cindy Lee, LCSW.

Throughout the course of our work we have discovered there is a missing piece to helping individuals heal from the negative hurtful events they were exposed to throughout their lives. Individuals may have made sense of the events on a cognitive level and even on an emotional level but have not yet taken the journey to understand how these life events (both big and small) have impacted their positive self-worth.

In addition, when caregivers learn about their personal attachment style, they often seek answers in how to change it. Before now, a curriculum or guide to help them do this did not exist. Now we have it, and it is an amazing step-by-step program for helping adults gain secure attachment. In addition, caregivers with their own trauma histories also have a difficult time meeting the needs of the children in their home because their own histories get in the way. This program helps adults overcome their own painful pasts so they can be free to be the caregiver they desire to be, the spouse they desire to be, the friend they desire to be and even the person they want to be in their profession.

This program is designed for any individual desiring to obtain positive self-worth or secure attachment. Participants will go through a series of sessions in a group format designed to help them understand how the events in their lives have contributed to low self-worth. The classes focus on developing an understanding of the “lies” an individual believes about themselves, such as “I am not good enough,” or “I am not smart enough,” or “I have no patience” and how to replace these lies with truth. In addition, once a participant is released from the beliefs associated with the past, the sessions focus on rebuilding a new life based on positive self-worth as well as how to maintain these gains.

The program is comprised of 8 sessions lasting 2 hours in duration. We have day time and evening sessions available. Class size is generally no larger than 12 participants. We offer men’s classes and women’s classes, as well as a faith-based bible study called Anchored. Virtual classes are being offered as well.

Cost:
The cost of this program is $45 per session. There are 8 two hour sessions with each session being once a week. Discount available if paid in full prior to first session. If the cost is prohibitive to your participation, some scholarships are available. Please, just let us know.

Waitlist:
To sign up for this program, email katherinewheeler@connectedtreasures.com. You can also call or text 315-758-0587.